“The heart of man is very much like the sea, it has its storms, it has its tides and in its depths it has its pearls too” –Vincent van Gogh
Cosmic Tide Acrylic on 12 x 12 inch Archival cotton canvas. We are all in the cosmic flow. Don’t fight it. Ride the wave with openness and joy.
You probably enjoy reading my blog because often you find it uplifting or inspiring. I like to focus on what we can do and I encourage you to connect to your joy. However, we all go through periods in life that are very challenging. The path is curved and the altitude changes often. Sometimes the terrain causes us to work harder and navigate large obstacles.
I’ve had some very large obstacles like the loss of my husband, Chris Nadler, in 2012. I had never dealt with a challenge of this magnitude and it knocked me down for a long time. Currently, I’m navigating the steep decline of my father's health. It's causing a lot of pain to ripple through my family. It's interesting that now I see my husband's tragic sudden death as a gift. He was out hiking with our beautiful children, then 10 and 12, on a spectacular day. He was in the prime of his life. He died of a massive heart attack instantly. No pain, no suffering, he just left. The children and I experienced tremendous suffering. We were in shock. It felt like we were on a boat in the arctic that capsized in the icy water and we were drowning in fear and freezing with uncertainty.
My father's path has been different. He has led a rich and full life. However, he has been suffering for years and now it has reached an unbearable peak. It is hard to witness someone suffer. It is hard to witness my mother suffer in the process. My brother has been their rock. He lives close to them and has been very helpful. He visits them both very often and does whatever he can. Being farther away, I visit less often but have long conversations with my father on the phone and speak to my mother several times a day. I try to support them emotionally and by helping with tasks and phone calls to doctors and caregivers.
I have gained some wisdom to share with you. I have been on a Spiritual Journey for over 9 years. I believe that life is eternal. This body is born and it dies but our souls don't perish. At the core of all these experiences, we can find peace. The suffering we feel or witness can open our hearts and challenge our thinking. We may emerge better, kinder, more compassionate people. We are best served by being very kind to ourselves and practicing self-care, for ourselves and for those we are supporting.
The following is a list of practices that have helped me get through the tough times and I encourage you to keep it handy if you ever find yourself navigating rough waters:
Get proper rest
Eat nutritious foods
Meditate
Practice gratitude
Exercise
Feel the feelings
Stay in the present moment
Breathe and/or breathwork practice
Get support from professionals, peer support and/or clergy
Write in a journal
Walk in nature
Be of service to others
Read uplifting books or articles
Receive or give hugs
Do small projects to change your focus and feel accomplished
Express your feelings through an art project
Listen to uplifting music
Use an aromatherapy diffuser
Do some EFT tapping
Watch a feel-good movie
Use humor to lighten the mood (my dad’s favorite)
Connect with friends and loved ones
Never give up on your dreams
The happiest I had ever seen my dad was on my wedding day. He was beaming with pride. When he became a grandfather his happiness leveled up beyond what I could have imagined.
It's not the wins that make us successful in life, it's how we deal with the challenges. It's easy to feel great when the weather is sunny but sailing through the storms and making it back to shore are the real tests of character. I like using ocean metaphors here because my father was a fisherman. It has been his lifelong passion only surpassed by the love of his grandchildren. In the end, it's our relationships that provide the most fulfillment. I encourage you to live boldly, love fiercely, and follow your dreams as my dad did.
Thank you for reading.
I love you,
Leslie
P.S. At the time of this posting my father has found peace. His memory will forever be a blessing. Click the first button to read about his life. Click the second button to see him in action and be sure to watch till the end.